as president roth so eloquently articulated in his speech to the PBK class of 2008, there exists a great paradox that comes with opportunity, privilege and education.
opportunity and education affords us limitless flexibility and space to learn and explore, create and dissect, and question and answer. from my college experience, i have come to truly and genuinely cherish and appreciate this. however on the same token, i have come to learn that opportunity and education unlock knowledge and realities that make me wish I had never gone down that path of inquiry from the start. it seems that the more i learn about the world, the more i am made aware of the paradoxes and contradictions that exist. in short, how fucked up the world is. and the more and more i learn, the more i become paralyzed and immobilized by cynicism, pessimism, anger and fear. do i know too much? ignorance is most certainly bliss.
a major source of these dark and oppressive emotions does not come from how i perceive the world but rather how i see myself in this context. i take a look at my actions and i can’t help feeling guilty and responsible for contradictions in my own actions and words in every aspect of my life. how can i judge others when i am contributing and fueling the machine.
i guess the key is to turn apathetic cynicism into constructive criticism. easier said than done.